A special gold star to whoever’s internet can actually load this entire list.
1.
This accurate estimate of what most Australians would use their magic wish for:
[australia]
me: i found a genie
friend: omg don’t do anything stupid
me *wishing for faster internet so i don’t have to switch to 4G in my own fucking house* like what
Twitter: @cloxic
3.
This glimpse BTS of Australia’s major internet providers:
what I imagine happened at @TPG_Telecom after not being able to access their website because my internet isn’t working 🥴
Twitter: @Isha_Bassi
4.
This insightful take on Australia’s war against cyber attacks:
Not sure why the government would need to spend $1.3 billion dollars to protect us against cyber warfare when Australia’s internet is so slow that probably hackers will die of old age before they can access anything important?
Twitter: @ElizabethFlux
5.
This sarcastic observation on how Australia’s WFH life is going:
With lots of people likely to be working from home, it’s lucky Australia has such fast, reliable internet.
Twitter: @TitusOReily
7.
This embarrassing celebration of our mediocre internet speed:
Australian internet providers seem so proud… while the rest of the world laughs at our shit speeds! 😂😭
Twitter: @ChampChong
8.
These golden lessons that sum up Australian life:
What I learned in Australia:
u must use “cunt” three (3) times per sentence
it’s ok to be an alcoholic
wifi is more valuable than water
Twitter: @LUCALUSH
9.
This all-too-relatable summation of Australian culture:
People think Australian culture is about mateship and and lamingtons and stuff but mostly it’s about having to turn off wifi and use data in your own home
Twitter: @LukaCMuller
10.
This national slogan that’s hidden in the fine print on the Australian flag:
Twitter: @koreykuhl
11.
This cyclical journey of utter despair:
Australian culture is turning off your home wifi to use your 4g to check your provider’s outage site but your 4g also doesn’t work and the outage site is down :’)
Twitter: @wafflesquire
13.
This humiliating insight into what international visitors experience after stepping out of the plane:
Australian Free Airport WiFi: Get ready for HIGH SPEED INTERNET!
Aussies: This is about what I get at home, cool.
International visitors: Is… Is Australia still on dial-up?
Twitter: @Hexanguine
14.
This relatable commentary on the “maintenance disruptions”:
FUCK YEAH TELSTRA: “YOUR NBN CONNECTION MAY BE SIGNIFICANTLY DISRUPTED ON JUNE 11 DUE TO MAINTENANCE”
ME/AUSTRALIA: “WHAT’S THE REASON EVERY OTHER FUCKING DAY?”
Twitter: @nadinevoncohen
18.
This picture of what is surely the glorious hub of Australia’s NBN:
#Optus is this guy one of your guys?
Local #NBN technician baffled at why we have slow internet in Australia.
Twitter: @LearnKotch
20.
This reminder to always lower your expectations:
if I wanted internet other than 4G I should simply not have moved 12km from the centre of Australia’s second-largest city
Twitter: @MattCowgill
21.
This very real thing that Australia’s government were forced to do:
It is April in The Year Of Our Lord 2021, and the government of Australia has had to publish a statement to say that #COVID19 vaccines don’t connect you to the internet.
https://t.co/I5J76JF1Id
Twitter: @alistaircoleman
23.
And finally, this wholesome reminder that at the end of the day, shit ain’t so bad Down Under:
Spent the day adventurin Australia in search of wifi. Despite its lack of internet connection, Aus is prob the most beautiful place Ive seen
Twitter: @GraysonDolan
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